Thinking...

... I probably should not have gotten a new battery for my scale. I was happier without it...


...Being a Mom to two boys is the best thing in the Universe...


...It's hard to realize that I don't have a baby anymore and that I'm not going to have one any time soon...

...I don't know if I should beat my SIL to death for giving me the first book in a series or die in gratitude... both alternatives seem rather grisly....

...I should probably get off the computer and tell Sunny that not everything falls under the category "mine"....

... My mom and I are way too alike for us to be anything but dangerous together... hee hee...

Christmas

Waking up sleepyheads because they're too young to wake up early on Christmas.

A three year old shouting 'WOW! Santa DID come!"

Play kitchens come with sushi now...

Brunch at Grandma's with crepes and quiche, pan dulce, and pumpkin yummy...

Cousins in pretty dresses...

Ratatouille and train sets...

Visit from grandparents...

Ham for dinner, cuddles with Grandma on a massaging blanket...

Falling into a deep sleep on the way home...

The realization that Santa didn't take everything back...

Toys, Food... fun galore.

Realizing your sweetheart really knows you well...

Generosity to life changing proportions...

Lollipop in one hand... marshmallow rope in the other...

Two tiny Boys singing the Nutcracker in the shower...

Merry Christmas to all! I hope your Holiday was as wonderful as ours!

May your joy expand exponentially through out the year... And may we all impact the lives around us as ours have been impacted-- pass on the love, man!

THANK YOU! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Can't Wait For Christmas...

Yesterday...

...Drew kissed a stocking and pulled the ceramic piece holding it down on his head. Blood gushed. He cried, but more about me looking at it than anything.

Today...

...Drew disappeared (apparently) with my scissors and appeared with a slice in his finger. More blood. More tears. Put his hands over my eyes so I wouldn't look.

Hopefully Christmas will remedy these bad Mommy moments.

Think I'll be getting coal from Santa.

What Weaving Teaches us about Creation

It doesn't take much of a stretch to compare the fiber arts to creation-- after all, it is taking a base form and creating something complex and beautiful out of it with little more than your two hands. I also feel that it touches a spiritual place inside of use when we take natural fibers and create with them-- when spinning you touch and twist the fibers and they pass through your fingers-- you get to know each material intimately-- to understand what makes them work, to understand what their made out of, their texture, their build up, and what they might become through your hands. It makes me feel connected to nature-- closer to a truer appreciation of creation-- what exists. Admiring from a distance is one thing, but, as in gardening, digging one's hands deep into creation changes perspective.

And so, fiber becomes thread, becomes warp, becomes cloth, becomes clothes, becomes warmth... as the dust of the universe became you and me.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Sunny

My Sunny-baby just was playing ball with his brother. He snatched the ball and shouted 'MY BALL.'

Gotta love it when they learn how to talk!

Too Fun!

I'm having a great day-- mostly because I'm going outside of myself and trying to be outgoing and its given me a crazy amount of energy...

But, all in all, this week has been amazing, because I have been talking to my mom all week about weaving and she's picking it up-- it's so wonderful to be able to talk about fibers and colors and the warp and weft possibilities... and be so excited about things we can create together. It has made me so incredibly happy and I LOVE every minute of it.

It helps, also, that today my sister is moving back into town and I can't wait to be able to be parts of each others lives... I hope that will happen!

My mom is getting a four harness loom, with another four harness extension, which makes the possibilities limitless for what she/we can create-- we're talking tweed, herringbone... overshot...

It's all so very thrilling! Yay!

Wow

I came across this, just sort of my accident...

Some beautiful twist of fate...

Isn't it gorgeous?

Fear

On days like today, when my joints really hurt to the point where I see myself contorting my hands in response, I get very frightened. So much of who I am is based on my ability to use my hands-- painting, drawing, weaving, writing, knitting, crocheting, sewing, quilting, cooking, playing my violin... I need my hands to do these things. Being honest with myself and others, the prospect of being crippled by joint pain makes me pray that my time on this earth will be over before such a horrendous thing should occur. Without my hands I am not me.

What of my dreams for the future? How could I care for my children? What about my hopes of owning a stud farm and start competing in dressage. How can I do that if I can't close my fingers?



And I feel that, at 26, I should not be worrying about this sort of thing, but I have had joint pain since I was 17 years old and every year it gets worse.

I am trying to see how this kind of experience might make me stronger, but I can't see it yet. I'll just have to keep looking.

In the meantime, there's no chance this side of heaven that I'm going to let this pain limit me. I'll just set my teeth and keep doing my crafts and not let it get to me.

And I'll not think about it. If I don't think, I can't be afraid.

If chocolate isn't enough...

As if chocolate chip cookies weren't bad enough for us... I had the strange idea to break up pretzels and throw those in, too... we'll see how they turn out. They are in the oven as I type this.

I made my second etsy sale the other day-- a horse pendant I made out of polyclay.

It's gratifying to have my things sell, but then I want to spend all my time making things so I can have another sale, and I don't always have time for that... or the joint fortitude, which is the real problem these days.

Strep is gone by now, but I'm working on getting over a post-strep cold.

I'm getting very excited about Christmas-- we're really doing things big for the boys-- probably bigger than we should, but they're both at the ages where they appreciate things like this. We were wrapping things for Daddy today, and both boys were helping-- there's nothing better!

Sick, Again...

I can't explain how FUN it is to go visit family and have my joints start aching badly that very night... only to get worse the next day and then... the next morning have a sore throat and have the realization.

(JAWS music)

It's strep.

I probably took it with me, too... and I'm still recovering, even though that was Thanksgiving weekend. I ended up in Urgent Care close to having to go to the ER because my whole body was a mess. I'm on Penicillin....

But my boys are cute...